The Red Smed Hit Parade of the Year 2021

 

It's , yes, 2021. And it's Christmas. Covid has been with us for over a year and has now become Omicron. Which in the 1970's might have sounded like some Robot Saviour from another planet. But it isn't. So fuck all (in the most general sense) has happened since this time last year. And therefore here's the totally interesting (to me , if to no one else) updated 'Red Smed video charts'.  Most importantly, the big news of the year for me, is that i've now got a beard. I wasn't sure at first but now it seems to have grown on me.....

Song	Artiste	Composer	Dec-20	Dec-21	link
Partisan song	Red Smed	Trad	387,667	388,350	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1IDRK5Uryo
Leon Trotsky	Red Smed	Smedley	6,609	6,706	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sUfcWfouE_c&t=24s
Katyusha	Red Smed	Trad	6,554	6,652	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQLu2qEUzv8&t=5s
Secret Seven	Dangerous Brothers	Smedley	2,165	2,214	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxTwPfewBSM&t=32s
Bridgwater	Red Smed	Smedley	1,523	1,594	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQPYMX5e7nw&t=19s
Route 666	Club Whoopee	Trad	1,536	1,566	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pniaNUyGBGQ
Me and My Clone	Red Smed	Smedley/Newman	1,073	1,083	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3FtfJdpYp70
Fat Bald Dave	Red Smed	Smedley	965	1,022	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iu8slHpvcEo&t=7s
Too Fat to Rock	Red Smed	Smedley/Newman	893	930	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZxBbJ-15QhA
Drop Dead Darling	Red Smed	Smedley/Kane	865	883	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LyGX0dt_imM
Bohemia Sekt	The Visitors	Bartlett	850	883	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bj_zxkx7woc
Ello Ello Ello	Dangerous Brothers	Smedley/Rude	843	875	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBqJDSz_bpM&t=20s
I Need a Girlfriend	The Sedgemorons	Smedley/Beasley	774	837	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FT4nGtbHWuk
Do the Washing up	Red Smed	Smedley	774	829	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4j54MhkOPw
County Councillor	Dangerous Brothers	Smedley	736	773	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2xYqM0pbLM&t=28s
The Bridgwater Stop Line	Documentary	Smedley	99	639	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sBAcldyjmxk&t=138s
False Nose	Dangerous Brothers	Smedley	591	625	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kA-l8JmGDyY
The Internationale	Red Smed	trad	548	563	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3pQmCO3BB9Q
Rock n Roll Lizard	Club Whoopee	Smedley/Newman	509	531	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXuiavU3b-s
Bridgwater History Day 2020	Documentary	Smedley	265	515	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5BUD8igFRg&t=4800s
Drop Dead Darling (single)	The Sedgemorons	Smedley/Kane	452	510	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cLjdGl2dt6U
Party at Brians	Red Smed	SmedleyBeaslyFraserBruce	472	500	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORcN-1_CnU4&t=36s
The Magnificent Several	Red Smed	Trad	470	497	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k5KtBbuiqcY
Buddy can you spare a Dime	Club Whoopee	Trad	469	480	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukwqtlBwl9w
Swedish language yeh yeh yeh	Red Smed	Smedley	418	440	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVRm8TsjuQg
When Teddy’s Gone	The Spanners	Smedley/Vernon	406	416	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCAglEuYs60
Don’t be so bloody Miserable	Red Smed	Smedley	389	404	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AnPv5TEFFQE
Sin and Sodomy	Club Whoopee	Smedley/Mander	327	384	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uqaduML2aqA
Multifreight	Red Smed	Smedley	355	382	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yX9YpFgI6VA
Rock n Roll is Pretty Exciting	Red Smed	SmedleyBeasleyFraserBruce	352	359	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-yPQzPsENp8
Greed	The Sedgemorons	Smedley	347	356	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVUpuQPfDv4
We’re all going Shopping	Red Smed	Smedley/Kane	328	338	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXhBpSd4Tkc&t=26s
Clever Students	Dangerous Brothers	Smedley	298	323	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=09YUtXsbBhs&t=4s
Rock n roll is pretty Exciting (live)	Red Smed	Smedley/BeasleyFraserBruce	279	285	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQQgLhs2iuA
Stalin was a really Nice bloke	the Spanners	Smedley	254	267	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8vMkT_8ouU
George Formby	Dangerous Brothers	Smedley/Rude	213	248	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9FkO8Ay-3dg
Bonny Van Driver	Red Smed	Smedley	232	247	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YUyoe0BeC0
Leon Trotsky	The Sedgemorons	Smedley	214	245	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GW_XYw4YTdo&t=81s
Stogumber Cajun Gumbo	Red Smed	Smedley	230	242	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZ0F1d34p58&t=13s
internal organs	Dangerous Brothers	Rude	212	239	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wapy23WiMzs
I Hope you Die	The Funbunnies	Smedley / Newman	157	196	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3Knhv8wj44
Rhapsody in Westover	Red Smed	Smedley	164	171	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hn2hJa3gqKk
a very merry snowmouse	Snowmouse himself	trad	147	165	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OiaLQWyL6XQ
Mezi Horami (B'int 2015)	Red Smed	Cechomor arr Smedley	142	151	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nN4QMeyzWao
Sands of Morocco	The Visitors	Bartlett	142	148	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZchmnpwO90&t=2s
Dancing Shoes	Red Smed	Trad arr Smedley	127	140	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tu6v9WQkYP4
Westover Rhapsody	Red Smed	Smedley	70	130	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5DmhqtXSQH0&t=31s
Dave the snooker table	Sheep Worrying	Smedley/Vernon	111	117	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xg5ljIFuQlg
clare to here	Red Smed	Trad arr Smedley	101	115	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elwhdUGkgzE&t=41s
Avengers Theme (B'int 2017-18)	Red Smed	Trad arr Smedley	98	113	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T3s7iacaFwo
We'll be in love forever	Sheep Worrying	Smedley/McCausland	103	106	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zjZSnGOewLc
Smalltown	The Sedgemorons	Smedley/ Dixie	92	105	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkIm4RNheYU
Bad sir Bastard	Sheep Worrying	Smedley	97	104	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8nqjFQDIe6A
Women Only	The Sedgemorons	Smedley/ Dixie	78	92	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUGS4ccArpU
Rock n roll is pretty exciting	The Sedgemorons	SmedleyBeasleyFraserBruce	72	90	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w19WQvbey5E
You're sort of okay	Club Whoopee	Smedley/ Newman	61	79	https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XhxZw2iS5wk

 

Is It Christmas 2020 Already??

Well, yes it is. And combined with Covid I've got fuck all else to do so it's high time for me to devote a bit of pointless time to updating the Red Smed Hit Parade. That's the hit list of all my you tube videos based on well 'hits' by the general public and which will show me  which songs are the most popular this year...and, er, of course, which ones people hit on thinking it's something else..(see the top 5). It's always a surprise to me as well yes thanks for asking. But this year i've got my good friend Derek helping me. We've made a few videos together this year and as a songwriting team we're getting on really well. He's asked me to do a full album of lockdown videos...which..the way things are going...I'll probably do round about Boxing Day. That's if I haven't strangled the little fucker.

This years RED SMED TOP OF THE POPS HIT PARADE

To hear any of these songs go to last years page, scroll down and find all of them HERE.

The Red Smed Hit Parade 2019

It's 2019 and that means I've bugger all else to do on December 30th (I mean what kind of day even IS December 30th) (well, in fact it turns out to be the day that Neil Innes died)  than to check how popular my literally dozens of songs available on YouTube are with the (*clearly) discerning public. And are there any great surprises this year??

No.

Click on the link to click on the link. And see what happens.

I

Special Bonus feature ;Red Smed at the Engine Room reading the CLASH DAY Proclamation twinning Bridgwater with  Seattle USA

 

Red Smed-Interview with a Rock Legend

Red Smed with Joe Strummer

Today is the last day of normality in Bridgwater before the town goes hamster dropping crazy with its ground-breaking. Quayside Festival. Ground-breaking largely in the sense that they’ve dug up Fore street in order to replace some street furniture there and haven’t quite finished it. One of the musicians performing at this years Quayside is town council leader and fat local communist Red Smed. We asked him if he knew any rock legends we could interview.  Sadly he didn’t. But he gave us this interview instead.

Red Smed has a cup of tea

Bernard; When did you first play music?

Red;- Well, I’d just had my bowl of muesli, I had some lovely almond milk on it and a drop of honey, I turned on radio 4 to listen to the shipping forecast, in case I ended up in some sea faring mishap later in the day and then I picked up my guitar and strummed the first few chords to that new Ramstein song then..

Bernard;- No, not when today, when actually did you first play….? Are you listening? And can you stop eating those crisps while you’re talking please.

Red;- I’d say it was in the mid 50s.

Bernard:- But you weren’t even born then.

Red;- I went to catholic school

Bernard;- I’m sorry, I should have realised.

Red; Would you like a doughnut?

Bernard;- No. Now we’re looking for some famous musicians to interview.

Red; What about me?

Bernard; Yes exactly. Do you know any famous musicians we could interview??

Red;- I did play at the last gigs played by Joe Strummer and also Fred Wedlock. Icons of the punk scene.

Red Smed looks for something

Bernard;- ah.. and so. Oh wait a minute. Last gigs. They both died didn’t they.?

Red; Yes, shortly afterwards.

Bernard;- Have you thought of maybe supporting Ed Sheeran??

Red; I did write to Emma Bunton seeing if she needed any support.

Bernard; Moving swiftly on….What about PJ Harvey? Didn’t you play with her once?

Red;- Yes indeed I was on the same album in the same studio. Playing my accordion. The one my grandad brought back from Nazi Germany. It was a nice red one. Hitler closed down that accordion workshop and turned it into a munitions factory. Probably the worse thing he ever did.

Bernard;- Yes that reminds me, how is the fight against anti-semitism in the Labour Party going?

Red;- Not a single incident of anti Semitism in the local party at all.

Bernard;- Ah, so local Jewish members are all very happy then?

Red;-…Jewish members?

Red Smed has a sit down

Bernard;- Oh. I see. Moving swiftly on. Can you get us an interview with PJ Harvey? Do you remember the last thing you said to her?

Red; Oh yes. Very clearly. I said, "is this Johns house?

Bernard;- Ah, and then she said..

Red;- Well, nothing. That was it. It WAS Johns house. I went in and saw John.

Bernard;- Ok, right look. What we are looking for is some celebrity interview. We thought you might be able to help.

Red: You did?

Bernard;- I’ve been told that your mother taught Mel B to dance.

Red; Mel B from the Spice Girls?

Bernard;- No, Mel B from Alas Smith and Jones!

Red;- I thought that was Mel S.

Bernard ;No, that’s a small village in North Somerset near Frome

Red;- Siegfried Sassoon is buried there.

Bernard;- Ah right the famous war poet so…oh, right , buried…so also dead then..

Red;-I really do hope so…

Red Smed finds a third shoe

Bernard;- Do you know Mel B?

Red; No.

Bernard; Right. Do you know ANY body famous?

Red;- Does Diane Abbot count?

Bernard;- I think you’re setting up your own punchlines now….

Red Would you like a cheese sandwich?

Bernard; No. Now, about Quayside festival..

Red Whats that?

Bernard;- Its where you're playing this weekend

Red; Is it? I’ve got down ‘haircut’ and ‘feed cat’ in my diary.

Bernard;- You feed your cat ‘hair’?

Red We’re not savages you know.

Bernard;- So..Quayside Festival. This is a major new festival in the Bridgwater calander

Red Yes

Bernard  Which, er has been going for just 3 years

Red yes

Bernard; you don’t have to keep saying yes

Red No

Red Smed finds a box of toy dinosaurs

Bernard The Quayside festival is on Saturday 20^th July. When will you be playing?

Red Friday the 19^th

Bernard That’s not part of Quayside festival.

Red No

Bernard  And WHERE will you be playing on SATURDAY 20^th??

Red West Bagborough

Bernard That’s NOT in Bridgwater

Red Well neither’s Los Angeles.

Bernard You surprise me. So what will you be playing?

Red The guitar

Bernard;- Oh, not the accordion then?

Red What accordion?

Bernard;- The one you’re holding..

Red;- Oh, bloody hell, I wondered where that went….

Bernard;- Right that’s it…give me that…..

(at this point the tape recording descended into a series of barely audible screams and sounds of wanton mechanical destruction.)

Big Arthur;- When the tape was found in the burnt down apartment we managed to transcribe what remained for posterity and it is now stored in the Bridgwater Music Hall of Famousness and Interestingness. Alongside similar tapes by Fred Wedlock and Joe Strummer. Plus a blank sheet of paper with only the words "Ed Sheeran?" written on it...

The Quayside festival really is happening this weekend for proof click here

The main band performing at various gigs is THE LOREANS. click here

To find out more about twinning week click here

Red Smed will be on stage with THE DAVE THE MILKMAN BIG BAND (see below)

IF EVERYBODY HAD AN OCEAN...Well, we'd all drown wouldn't we

ITALIAN RETRO-SURF SENSATIONS

‘THE LOREANS’

TOUR SOMERSET SUMMER 2019

“The Lorean’s” are an Italian rock n roll band from the Anzio region of Lazio. Formed during the winter of 2015 they are aiming to “bring back the vibes of the 60’s and light up the coast”. Their original target was the Anzio coast (where British troops famously landed in 1944 during world war two) but now they are bringing their ‘surfs’ up’ music to the ‘west Coast’. Of England. Somerset in fact. Where they will be doing a 4 day tour taking in some of the tops venues in the Bridgwater area. And that INCLUDES West Bagborough Village Hall!!

Andrea Pucillo, lead vocalist of The Loreans says “ Our musical repertoire is about rock ‘n roll, beat and surf rock sounds with the recent addition of some psychedelic rock pieces. Our setlist features artists such as “The Beatles”, “The Beach Boys”, “The Doors”, “Elvis Presley” and so much more.The band’s name is a tribute and a reference to the movie “Back to the future”, because, as for the De Lorean, we travel back in time!”

So, you can judge for yourselves by catching up with the SurfSwingingItalians at any of the following gigs.

Friday 19^th July 

BRIDGWATER ARTS CENTRE (part of Bridgwater Twinning Party and also featuring the Dave the Milkman Big Band)  7.30-11pm

Saturday 20^th July 

WEST BAGBOROUGH VILLAGE HALL 7.30-11pm

Sunday 21^st July 

PEBBLES INN at WATCHET 3-5pm

Monday 22^nd July 

BAR BRUNEL, BRIDGWATER 8-11pm

The Lorean’s are:

Andrea Pucillo: rhythm guitar, vocals

Marco Negro: lead guitar, vocals

Luca Pianconi: drums, vocals

Gianfranco Bernacchia: bass, vocals

Eugenio Di Corinto: keyboards, vocals

AND IF YOU'RE LUCKY...AND LUCKY IS NOT NECESSARILY THE WORD....THEN THE 'DAVE THE MILKMAN BIG BAND' WILL ALSO BE PLAYING SOME  OF THESE GIGS

See full Czech tour report here

You Think Country and Rap don't work together? Come and see Gangstagrass.

For the next couple of weeks I will be tour manager for the American band Gangstagrass and if you're anywhere near their tour route I'd suggest you dropped into a gig. Gangstagrass blend Hip-hop percussion and  bluegrass instrumentation with rap vocals and country backing. How does that work?? Better than anyone could imagine with "Banjo arpeggios and Fiddle flourishes tucked between  rapped verses, creating a bridge between two seemingly disparate genres." And that last quote wasn't me it was in Rolling Stone where one of their songs has been voted into the top 10 of all time influential country songs. So that's a recommendation in itself.

I took this lot on a tour in 2016. At that time it was the UK and Holland. Donald Trump had just been elected and they were embarrassed. Bernie Sanders supporters to a man. And woman. It's almost 3 years later and it'll be interesting to know what they think now....

If this lot don't sum up what's best about Americana then I don't know what does. Maybe someone will cross Rage against the Machine with the Everly Brothers one day and that'll be that.

Tour itenary

The tour takes us from London on 29th January where they're playing the American Festival in Hackney (at the Nightales) along with a host of other US bands to Portsmouth, Wedgewood Rooms on Jan 30th then down to the Pheonix in Exeter on31st.

By February they're up country. Well, Bristol. Where they play the Thekla on Feb 1st and Oxford 02 Academy on Feb 2nd then up to Manchester Band on the Wall on Feb 3.

Hopefully hitting Scotland before the snow does, they'll be at the Inchyra Arts Centre on Feb 5th and Glasgow Hug and Pint on Feb 6th.

Back to England it's Newcastle the Cluny on Feb 7th and Birmingham 02 institute 3 on Feb 8th winding up at the Garage on Highbury corner back in London on Feb 9th.

Rench yourself off your sofa

I'll be there. And so should you be Dave. Dave? Where's Dave gone. Bloody hell.

Red Smed

We are Quite Literally All Going on a Summer Holiday

Many years ago, when the earth was young and the Czech Republic hadn't even been invented, we sent a jolly band of musicians off to discover the former Czechoslovakia. Which of course was at that time, the current Czechoslovakia. Which of course is now the Czech Republic. And Wales. 10 people went out, only 8 returned. 2 are still there. Good. But that was then. This is now. Tomorrow is Wednesday. Unless you're reading this on a Wednesday in which case, well work it out for yourself.

Brian 'Red Smed' Smedley explains to a TV crew why he WILL 

take a band to the Czech republic and nothing they say will stop him

In 1992 we toured Prague and Uherske Hradiste.

We scraped together a pop group. In much the same way Cliff Richard might have done.

Then we learnt some songs.

Then we got ourselves a bus.

Then we drove it across Europe having wacky adventures on the way.

Who can forget the teacake incident in Frankfurt, the 'oh no it's a canal' incident in Amsterdam and of course the running down an old lady in Liege court case.

Yes 2 of our members never came back. One  married a Czech policewoman and the other's a certified nutjob.

Twats

So now it's 2018 (checks watch) . Yes! And we're doing it again. We're off to see the wizard. Well, we're following the yellow brick road. Or the Autobahn 4 to Koln then A3 to Nurnburg then diverting slightly off towards Rozvadov and all points Czech. So we needed a band.

A Summer Holiday tribute wouldn't be worth it's weight in haddock if it didn't include lapsed catholic and lapsed communist Red Smed. The only surviving member from the original tour. Smed was a particularly hard task master and had them all shot. Red Smed has been described as 'a bit on the fat side', 'should learn to play the guitar a bit better' and 'speaks Czech like a Bulgarian'. On lead guitar ladies and gentleman its the Fat Bopper himself.

Click here to see why Red Smed is 'Too Fat to Rock'

A Bit Bonkers

Yvette, has music written all through her

Singing sensation Yvette Staelens has sung in choirs, close harmony folk ensembles and petrol stations the world over. The leader of the 'Voice of the People Community Choir' which has toured every single European country , and that includes Cornwall, Yvette has an onstage personality described as 'on stage'. Her Hammer horror tribute act 'the Tribe of Boris' was unfortunately accidentally invited to play last years Conservative party conference due to a misunderstanding and, sadly, exploded. Disappointingly no one was hurt.

Drummer Ted 'Ted' Franklin has played in every band in the wider Wiveliscombe area including many that have yet to be formed and several that were arrested after the first chorus. Ted's drum style has been described as 'a bit drummy'. As has his haircut. People will remember top British acts such as the Beatles, the Stones, the Who and Uncle Freds Lucky Tandem.  Ted remembers them too.

Milk

Dave, a milkman

The star of the show. And of any show where he's the only artiste performing, is Dave the Milkman. Dave -a milkman, has been delivering milk for 40 years man and boy. Depending on what he feels like each morning. Dave decided to call this band the Dave the Milkman Big Band as Czechs will probably have never heard of milkmen (nb - people who deliver milk to your house) and his vast knowledge of milk related anecdotes always go down well at a dinner table. Especially when Dave is dining alone. Dave is not just a milkman, although in England that's somewhere between Duke and Taxi Driver on the social scale, he's also a singer -guitarist who knows every song that Gilbert O Sullivan ever wrote. And thankfully has never played any of them.

Martin Lauer is a Czech session bassist who has never met any of the above in his life but having recently returned from studying sand in Indonesia he found he had nothing left to live for. Tossing a coin one day he opted for giving music one more chance. A good choice as the second option, sticking a Kalashnikov in his mouth, would have probably not looked great at the local Job centre.

The 'Dave the Milkman Big Band' will be in the Czech Republic from 22nd-26 August and back in England 'pretty quickly' afterwards.....